Help me write online dating profile

If the Internet is good for anything—and, actually, it’s good for lots of things—it’s good for finding a needle in a haystack.

Whether you’re hankering after a pistol grip for that vintage Hasselblad single reflex camera, or want to learn all the lyrics to R. M.’s “It’s the End of the World as We Know it,” the World Wide Web has made tracking down and securing even the most obscure objects your heart desires a lot easier.

Have you ever heard anybody saying “yes, yes, I am definitely self-centered.” So this one doesn’t really count!!“If you’re looking for a solid, long-term relationship-type, avoid pictures of yourself drinking excessively or making kissy faces at the camera,” Robinson says.“If you’re just looking for a fling, skip the photos from the church bake-off and beef it up appropriately.” Extra points for artsy/humorous/evocative shots.Even high-strung people often think they’re ‘laid-back.’ Find something more descriptive.” Other common terms to be avoided: “cool,” “awesome,” “funny.” “Nearly everyone ‘loves to laugh’ and ‘enjoys fun.’ None of that sets you apart. “Put yourself into a potential date's shoes on this one. ’ Blech—that conversation is a total wipeout.” A better alternative, she explains, is telling stories.Instead of saying, ‘I’m witty,’” Robinson suggests, “say, ‘I’m one part Ricky Gervais, one part Jon Stewart, and a soupcon of Fred Flintstone.’ That paints a more vivid picture.” I like surfing, reading, swimming, jogging, and cooking. If you saw a list like this on a cute girl’s profile, how would you possibly respond? “ ‘Last summer, I went surfing at the Jersey Shore nearly every day with my dog Rufus. Buy me a beer, and I’ll tell you more.’ Something like that gives a date plenty to want to talk to you about—plus you sound like an active, interesting person, not just a list of gerunds.” Don’t stretch the truth, even on minor details.

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[pagebreak] Miss Information tells us it can be truly mindboggling what red flags people slip into their profiles. Any hint of sad trombone will send quality dates running.” Give a critical eye to the potential profile shots, and think about the message they’re sending.

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